Domestic abuse can take on many forms – including someone controlling your ability to access and spend your own money. This is known as financial abuse and is unfortunately experienced by millions of people in the UK every year.
From a spouse running up debt in your name to a relative spending your money without your permission, if anyone is preventing you from being able to use your hard-earned money as you choose, you could be a victim of financial abuse.
Whether you’re worried someone is taking advantage of you financially or you think a friend, family member or neighbour is being financially abused, it’s important to deal with it in the right way.
What is financial abuse?
Financial abuse (also known as economic abuse) is a blanket term used to describe the many ways in which someone can mistreat and control you with regards to your financial affairs.
It usually occurs alongside other forms of abuse, such as psychological and physical abuse, and is used as a means of keeping someone in an abusive relationship.
For example, if someone is stealing your money or identity, preventing you from accessing your finances, savings, or possessions, or pressuring you into handing over money or inheritance, you could be experiencing financial abuse.
It’s most common among the ageing population (individuals aged 65 and over) as they typically lack the mental capacity required to make financial decisions and are therefore the most vulnerable to coercion, but it can happen to anyone at any age.
Most perpetrators of financial abuse do it in an attempt to diminish someone’s ability to support themselves. This then forces the victim to rely on them financially, preventing them from being able to leave the relationship.
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What does financial abuse include?
Financial abuse can take on various forms but identifying the warning signs – whether in yourself or someone else – is key to being able to do something about it.
Here are some of the actions that can be considered financial abuse:
Forcing you to take out money or credit in your name
Someone forcing you to withdraw your money for their own personal use is financial abuse. Applying for credit in your name is also classed as financial abuse and identity theft as any debts accrued due to missed payments will be in your name and you’ll be chased for the money owed.
Making you hand over control of your accounts
Being made to hand over control of your accounts (e.g. bank accounts or credit cards) is another tactic commonly used by financial abusers. This could range from someone taking your phone to check the balance on your bank account to forcing you to change your login details to a username and password of their choice, leaving you unable to pay bills or treat yourself.
Pressuring you to change your will
Someone forcing you to make changes to your will that you’re not comfortable with for their own financial gain is another sign of financial abuse. They might do this by removing a significant beneficiary or changing the way assets are allocated.
Controlling your spending
In most cases of financial abuse, the perpetrator will control how and when you spend your money. This usually also includes asking for a detailed breakdown of what you’ve spent your money on and, in some cases, criticising you for spending money on anything they deem unnecessary or that doesn’t add value to their life.
Interfering with your finances
Interfering with your finances can be another way someone tries to abuse you financially. This might involve them offering to help you with your budget as a cover for getting you to spend less on yourself and more on them. They might also confiscate your paycheck or intercept your financial documents (e.g. bank statements) to keep an eye on all aspects of your finances.
How to spot financial abuse
Knowing how to identify financial abuse is key to being able to help someone who might not be able to help themselves. Here are some of the key warning signs that might suggest someone close to you is experiencing financial abuse:
Sudden or unexpected changes in appearance or behaviour
One of the first warning signs of financial abuse is a sudden or unexpected change in appearance or behaviour. For example, if someone used to take pride in their appearance but now makes little effort or has started dressing drastically differently, this might indicate that someone is controlling their finances.
Dramatic change in living conditions
As well as someone appearing or behaving differently, a dramatic change in living conditions can also indicate that someone is experiencing financial abuse. This might occur if they can no longer afford the property they were previously living in and have been forced to downsize or move in with parents or flatmates.
Inability to stick to social plans
Another key sign of financial abuse is when someone continually cancels or rearranges social plans due to not having any money. Similarly, if a friend never seems to have any money anymore despite having a full-time job, this could suggest that their finances are being controlled by someone else.
New friends or acquaintances
Noticing someone you know spending time with new friends or acquaintances, taking trips with them, or moving in with them very quickly can be an indication that they might be being used for their money.
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How might financial abuse affect someone’s job?
Financial abuse can affect your job in many ways. This could be done as a deliberate attempt to limit your earning potential or as a result of someone controlling your finances.
For example, if you’re considering a change of career or a new job that pays more than your current salary, a financial abuser might convince you not to do it in an attempt to prevent you from earning more. In extreme circumstances, they might even pressure you to quit your job to minimise or eliminate your income altogether.
They might also sabotage your work responsibilities by visiting, calling, or harassing you while you’re at work. This might lead to you being punished or even fired, preventing you from being able to earn a wage of your own and resulting in you becoming financially dependent on them.
Financial abuse can also have an indirect impact on your job by causing you to miss work due to stress, anxiety, or depression. This can also make it difficult to explain the reason for your absence – especially if you’re not ready to accept that you’re being financially abused.
What can I do if I suspect someone I know is suffering from financial abuse?
If you think someone close to you might be experiencing financial abuse, it’s important to approach the situation with empathy.
We’ve put together a short guide to help you know how to talk to someone who you’re worried is being financially abused:
Express concern
When you bring up the topic of financial abuse, it’s important to be non-judgmental and let the person know you’re coming from a place of concern. To do this, don’t ask too many questions and let them know you’re there for them if and when they need someone to talk to.
Use supportive language wherever possible and try to see the situation from their perspective. Fear of being judged is one of the most common reasons preventing victims from speaking out about financial abuse so making it clear that you’re worried about their wellbeing can help them open up to you.
Listen
The most important thing to keep in mind when talking to someone about the financial abuse they are experiencing is to let them know you are listening. Simply knowing someone is paying attention to what they are saying can make it feel like a weight has been lifted – especially if they’ve never spoken to anyone about the situation before.
If they’re struggling to give much detail or they’re evading certain questions, never force a response. Recognising how difficult it can be to talk to someone about something as serious as financial abuse can help you better understand how they may be feeling.
Provide support
Lastly, it’s crucial to remind a victim of financial abuse that support is always available, whether it comes from you or a professional organisation. Reaching out for expert help can be difficult when someone is controlling your financial resources – especially if you’re also being subjected to other forms of controlling behaviour.
There are many avenues of support for individuals experiencing domestic abuse. Depending on the severity of the situation, it might be appropriate to reach out for emergency help on someone else’s behalf sooner rather than later.
Can financial abuse only occur between partners or spouses?
It’s a common misconception that financial abuse can only happen between two people who are in a relationship. It’s also a widespread belief that it’s only experienced by women.
However, while it’s most common among partners or spouses, financial abuse can exist between anyone with a financial link. This can include parents and grown-up children, carers and vulnerable adults, and even neighbours or friends living in shared accommodation.
It can be difficult to detect among family members as it’s commonly dismissed as a family argument or argued that it’s in the best interest of the victim. Some of the ways financial abuse can present in families include forcing someone to work for a family business without being fairly compensated or taking out a loan or credit card in their name.
Put simply, financial abuse can be perpetrated by anyone who is in a position of power or trust over another person’s finances. Knowing this can help you identify financial abuse in someone you know and potentially do something to put a stop to it.
Can a shared bank account lead to financial abuse?
Shared bank accounts are common in many relationships – especially among married couples that share a home – and rarely result in financial abuse. It can make splitting household costs (e.g. rent, mortgage, bills) and saving for a large family expense (e.g. a holiday, wedding, car) easier.
However, if your partner starts restricting your access to the joint account or prevents you from having your own bank account alongside it, this can be a sign of financial abuse.
It’s important to recognise when something as innocent as having a shared bank account is turning into something more sinister like financial abuse.
Remember, if you end up owing money to a joint account, both parties will become responsible for repaying 100% of the debt, not just their individual share. This means that, if you take out a joint bank account together but only one of you uses the account, you will both be chased for any money owed as your name will also be listed on the credit agreement.
Which organisations can help with financial abuse?
Whether you’re experiencing financial abuse or know someone who is, there are various organisations that can provide some much-needed help and support.
The National Domestic Abuse Helpline can help you understand your options if you’re experiencing domestic violence of any kind or you want to support someone else in your life who you’re worried is being abused.
Their term of highly-trained female advisors can be contacted 24 hours a day on 0808 2000 247. They also have an online chatbot, which is available Monday-Friday from 10am until 10pm.
The Financial Support Line is another resource designed to help victims of financial abuse. It offers specialist advice to anyone who is suffering from financial difficulty as a result of domestic abuse.
The helpline – which is run in partnership between Surviving Economic Abuse and Money Advice Plus – can be contacted Monday- Friday from 9am until 5pm on 0808 1968 845.
Finally, your local council may be able to provide access to local services designed to help victims of financial abuse. They should also be able to inform you of any relevant benefits or grants you’re entitled to as a result of your financial situation.
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Conclusion
Financial abuse occurs when a perpetrator attempts to gain control over another person’s financial affairs. It typically occurs between people who are known to each other and therefore who it would not be unusual to have a financial connection with.
Knowing how to spot the warning signs of financial abuse is key to being able to recognise when someone close to you is being taken advantage of or mistreated with regards to their finances. Some of the key indicators of financial abuse are sudden or unexpected changes in behaviour or appearance, an inability to stick to social plans, and new friends or acquaintances.
Getting a shared bank account can make you vulnerable to financial abuse – especially if you’re already a victim of domestic or emotional abuse. Always do your research and carefully consider whether you want to join your finances with someone before taking such a serious step.
